Tag Archives: to seek is to find

start where you are…

start where you are

You can’t go back and change the beginning,
but you can start where you are
and change the ending.

— C. S. Lewis —

frida kahlo to marty mcconnell…

leaving is not enough; you must
stay gone. train your heart
like a dog. change the locks
even on the house he’s never
visited. you lucky, lucky girl.
you have an apartment
just your size. a bathtub
full of tea. a heart the size
of Arizona, but not nearly
so arid. don’t wish away
your cracked past, your
crooked toes, your problems
are papier mache puppets
you made or bought because the vendor
at the market was so compelling you just
had to have them. you had to have him.
and you did. and now you pull down
the bridge between your houses.
you make him call before
he visits. you take a lover
for granted, you take
a lover who looks at you
like maybe you are magic. make
the first bottle you consume
in this place a relic. place it
on whatever altar you fashion
with a knife and five cranberries.
don’t lose too much weight.
stupid girls are always trying
to disappear as revenge. and you
are not stupid. you loved a man
with more hands than a parade
of beggars, and here you stand. heart
like a four-poster bed. heart like a canvas.
heart leaking something so strong
they can smell it in the street.

— Marty McConnell —

 

fever pitch…

You place me at the perfect height: our eyes peer directly into the other’s. your hips gently push my legs apart as you move in to kiss me.  And like today’s welcome rain, the tenderness of your lips refreshes me like each drop of cleansing, wet air. We pause to simply drink one another in. Your gaze incites release. I feel my heart sob with joy.

I trace your sweet face and with each adoring sweep, I hold you so that I might give you the gift that lesser men have quailed from: I see you with open eyes. I accept your imperfect, scared smallest self. I smile, willing a courage I barely recognize myself. My fingertips imprint light into every crack they find. I trust, and in this, I offer you the best of myself.

You can feel pressure inside your chest building; it builds inside the history of your borders and boundaries, inside what others have forbidden and allowed, inside the dam that barely holds your fear at bay. You feel lost inside all this… space. Permission. You look down, away from me.

“It… feels… too much,” you say.
“To be found?” I ask.

Startled, you meet my eyes. And suddenly kiss me again. This time, on my temples, my brow, my high cheekbones, my sweet dimples, and full lips. Your hands hold me as your body urgently speaks words you’re not yet brave enough to say.

Your fingers deftly – tenderly – slide from my knee, up my velvety inner thigh and lighty… so so lightly, your fingers move up and down, inching closer to the wet that swells my pussy.  Reaching the velvety corner deep between my legs, between my thighs and mound, you look at me again, intent. You watch my expression as your fingers slowly so slowly flip and dance, back and forth – this time moving closer to my swollen, pulsing lips.

The fever has pitched. My petal-soft folds moan their pleasure through my throat. It comes out a gasping breath, a call and response led by my voice saying your name. My panties now to the side, I lean back with my long legs spread and I hook my calves and feet around you.

This time our shared gaze smolders. This time, when you put your fingers in my mouth, one-by-one, your jaw drops a little with anticipation. My looking at you is unadorned.  I want you inside me so fucking much. I am hunger and need and promise personified. I am yours. We are your bidding…

shedding skin…

http://idterab.tumblr.com/post/121433691855

L
L
L
L
I regret opening up
to certain people;
they didn’t deserve
to know me like that.
The lessons continue to sear,
scabs fallen off long ago…

when time is spent…

Once, I met a man and I very nearly came the first time he entered me. I rode this man but I didn’t love him; I loved how his cock made me feel. He filled me beyond anything I’d ever known before.

A bird sits on my windowsill.
It fluffs its feathers and waits for others to arrive.
It doesn’t look up at the sun.
It sees me through my window and it simply serenades.

Many times, I made a man I (once) loved cum. I looked into his eyes as we filled one another; I looked because I saw him for who he was and still found joy. His lies filled me beyond anything I’d ever known before.

Sometimes we sleepwalk
Daylight fluffs its nighttime wings and whispers.
Someone traces secrets in the air that we cannot quite hear.
We blind ourselves – as one with the deaf and dumb.

I cry your name in deepest pleasure. I pull you close and feel impossibly new.  The breath I once thought my own, rides the wind over water, through trees of cedar, under bark. I sit and see truth.

In life we are undone.
In waking-dreams we are made new.
With the right person, healing happens
But first, we must awaken.

 

just a second choice…

I cup your balls in my hand as you straddle me on the bed to kiss me. Your mouth is sweet and my back arches up; I want my nipples to brush your broad chest. Our tongues play while my hand methodically works your hard into harder. Up and down and around, I twist you into a pleasure of moans.

I smile into our next kiss and you pause to look at me. Suspended above me, you look deeper into me than anyone else ever has. I love this about you – your boldness with me. The reward: I let you see me… it… I let you see how hungry I am for you. The tease of my smile and the dimples of delight in my cheeks give me – your bright-eyed lover – away.

I pull on your lip with my teeth as I pull your cock closer and with both hands, I knead that first gasp out of you. My legs splay under you, the inside of my knees pushing against the outside of yours. Every gasp and moan that escapes your beautiful mouth works me  into a state of wet. I am clever and tenacious, tender and wicked, saucy and sweet with your skin, with your mouth and the stunning thick of your amazing cock.

I want to be ready for you when you finally decide you must fuck me.
You aren’t the only one waiting to fill me.

I slide down until your cock slips into my mouth. My throat sucks you all the way in… and back. I push you deeper from behind. I hold you with my lips and suck you suck you suck. You want to thrust but I hold you still. You want to grab me everywhere. Your hands flail as I push your hips towards me just a. little. deeper. I suck you suck you suck.

This confidence I have with you translates so clearly: I will have you dizzy with desire. My mouth full of glorious, rock-hard cock, I watch you now as my hands push up behind your balls and slide back and forth, forth and back, back further until I slip inside and find that secret you keep. I slip inside and your eyes widen as you look down at me. Pressing down on that sweet bulb inside you, your gasps become cries and finally, finally! You finally pump… as you must.

You are so close.
But you want to fill me more… to spread my folds – in the deepest, hottest wet I am.

Fuck.
I’m more than ready.
Fuck fuck fuck
Fuck, yes.
Y.e.s.

 

where the wild things are…

Where do we come from?
where do we come from

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

what are we

 

What are we?

 

 

 

 

 

 

where are we going

Where are we going?

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